A Letter From the Future to 30 Year Old Me

On Children, A Pandemic, A Divorce, and Being Asian to Celebrate My 40th Birthday

Golden “40” birthday balloons
  1. Listen to your gut and don’t doubt what you’re feelings. Speaking of which, in 2015 when your wisdom tooth starts bothering you, do not let your dentist get away with trying to convince you otherwise. It’ll save you two molars and many thousands of dollars in dental work. (I really hope this advice doesn’t trigger some horrible future occurrence.)
  2. Anger takes up too much energy. Keep moving forward with love and consideration for others, but don’t leave yourself in the dust. We’re really good at suffering. It’s generational and cultural. Break that cycle. Give yourself that love and consideration too. (See above: Don’t take shit from people.)
  3. Continue lifting people up. I can’t wait for you to see all the beautiful, loving relationships you have. These relationships will be here when you falter.
  4. When you think you’re alone, know that you’re not. All you have to do is reach out to your village. It’s there. You’ve been nurturing it your whole life. And it’s been waiting for you to nurture yourself.
  5. Find your seat at the table as a Japanese woman. Speak up and be proud of who you are. Be humble, but know your value. I know you’ll convince yourself of this, but believe me when I say it is not luck that will get you to where you’re going. You’ll get there because you do the work and do it well.
  6. Oh, and I know we’re the queen of anxiety and we get wrapped up in being prepared, but — this is going to sound very woo woo — trust in the universe. Trust it. It’s got you.



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Nami Matsuo

She/Her. INFJ. Japanese American Womxn. Mother. Daughter. Sister. Ally. Avid Complainer & Optimist.